Teenage Lesbian: Part 2

Sam leaned against the lockers at school, headphones on, until Teresa approached and needed the one behind her. Sam stepped aside and caught herself staring—this girl was beautiful in a way she had never let herself admit before. Weeks later she sat cross-legged under the Christmas tree while her father handed her the package from her grandmother. The unwrapped dress puffed out in layers of taffeta and she felt sick. On the drive home with JC, Sam talked about Nicole’s New Year’s invite. JC’s sideways comments about how phony Nicole was landed harder than he knew. When the night finally came, Sam and Nicole tumbled through makeup routines and giggles in Nicole’s bedroom until a playful kiss on the cheek hung too long. Sam leaned in. Nicole shoved her back, called her a disgusting lesbian, and pointed at the door. Heart slamming, Sam typed the evening into her laptop journal, then kept seeing Teresa in the halls anyway. The rave that weekend throbbed with bass and fog. A girl slid up to Sam, mistaking her for a boy, and flirted hard. In the dim back room they kissed—Sam’s first real one—until the girl reached for Sam’s crotch and found nothing. Panic, then a rush of movement: another girl, Meg, stepped in, sent the first one packing, and calmly told Sam she had seen the act from the start. Meg said she liked girls too, that Sam wasn’t the first or the only one, and offered her a hand out of the dark.